Saturday, January 2, 2010

Here a bowl, there a bowl, everywhere a bowl bowl.

A little over a year ago -- on Dec, 18, 2008, to be exact -- I shared with you a list of the 34 bowl games played at the end of the 2008 college football season. I am chagrined mortified pleased as punch (Hubert Humphrey used to say that) to share the post-2009 season list with you today:

1. Dec. 19 - New Mexico Bowl (Wyoming vs. Fresno State), played at University Stadium in Albuquerque, NM
2. Dec. 19 - St. Petersburg Bowl (Rutgers vs. Central Florida), played at Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, FL
3. Dec. 20 - R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl (Southern Mississippi vs. Middle Tennessee State), played at the Superdome in New Orleans, LA
4. Dec. 22 - MAACO Bowl (Brigham Young University vs. Oregon State), played at Sam Boyd Stadium, Las Vegas, NV
5. Dec. 23 - San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl (Utah vs. California), played at Qualcomm Stadium, San Diego, CA
6. Dec. 24 - Sheraton Hawaii Bowl (Southern Methodist University vs. Nevada), played at Aloha Stadium, Honolulu, HI
7. Dec. 26 - Meineke Car Care Bowl (North Carolina vs. Pittsburgh), played at Bank of America Stadium, Charlotte, NC
8. Dec. 26 - Little Caesars Pizza Bowl (Ohio vs. Marshall), played at Ford Field, Detroit, MI
9. Dec. 26 - Emerald Bowl (Boston College vs. University of Southern California), played at AT&T Park, San Francisco, CA
10. Dec. 27 - Gaylord Hotels Music City Bowl (Clemson vs. Kentucky), played at LP Field, Nashville, TN
11. Dec. 28 - AdvoCare V100 Independence Bowl (Texas A&M vs. Georgia), played at Independence Stadium, Shreveport, LA
12. Dec. 29 - EagleBank Bowl (Temple vs. UCLA), played at RFK Stadium, Washington, DC
13. Dec. 29 - Champs Sports Bowl (Miami vs. Wisconsin), played at Florida Citrus Bowl Stadium, Orlando, FL
14. Dec. 30 - Roady’s Humanitarian Bowl (Bowling Green vs. Idaho), played at Bronco Stadium, Boise, ID
15. Dec. 30 - Pacific Life Holiday Bowl (Nebraska vs. Arizona), played at Qualcomm Stadium, San Diego, CA
16. Dec. 31 - Texas Bowl (Missouri vs. Navy), played at Reliant Stadium, Houston, TX
17. Dec. 31 - Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl (Air Force vs. Houston), played at Amon G. Carter Stadium, Fort Worth, TX
18. Dec. 31 - Brut Sun Bowl (Stanford vs. Oklahoma), played at Sun Bowl Stadium, El Paso, TX
19. Dec. 31 - Insight Bowl (Minnesota vs. Iowa State), played at Sun Devil Stadium, Tempe, AZ
20. Dec. 31 - Chick-fil-A Bowl (Virginia Tech vs. Tennessee), played at the Georgia Dome, Atlanta, GA
21. Jan. 1 - Outback Bowl (Auburn vs. Northwestern), played at Raymond James Stadium, Tampa, FL
22. Jan. 1 - Konica Minolta Gator Bowl (Florida State University vs. West Virginia), played at Jacksonville Municipal Stadium, Jacksonville, FL
23. Jan. 1 - Capital One Bowl (Penn State vs. LSU), played at Florida Citrus Bowl Stadium, Orlando, FL
24. Jan. 1 - Rose Bowl (Ohio State vs. Oregon), played at the Rose Bowl, Pasadena, CA
25. Jan. 1 - Allstate Sugar Bowl (Florida vs. Cincinnati), played at the Superdome, New Orleans, LA
26. Jan. 2 - International Bowl (South Florida vs. Northern Illinois), played at Rogers Centre, Toronto, Canada
27. Jan. 2 - Bowl (Connecticut vs. South Carolina), played at Legion Field, Birmingham, AL
28. Jan. 2 - AT&T Cotton Bowl Classic (Oklahoma State vs. Ole Miss), played at Cowboys Stadium, Arlington, TX
29. Jan. 2 - AutoZone Liberty Bowl (East Carolina vs. Arkansas), played at Liberty Bowl Memorial Stadium, Memphis, TN
30. Jan. 2 - Valero Alamo Bowl (Michigan State vs. Texas Tech), played at the Alamodome, San Antonio, TX
31. Jan. 4 - Tostitos Fiesta Bowl (Texas Christian University vs. Boise State), played at University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, AZ
32. Jan. 5 - FedEx Orange Bowl (Georgia Tech vs. Iowa), played at Dolphin Stadium, Miami, FL
33. Jan. 6 - GMAC Bowl (Troy vs. Central Michigan), played at Ladd Peebles Stadium, Mobile, AL
34. Jan. 7 - BCS National Championship Game (Alabama vs. Texas), played at the Rose Bowl, Pasadena, CA

I feel a rant coming on.

If you want to know the scores, the winners, the losers, whether any of the coaches have been fired, whether any of the cheerleaders are available for dating, and other items of apparently vital importance to the viewing audience, you will have to look elsewhere. I have no intention of providing such information to you. The only reason I published the list again was so that you could be as boggled as I am at the thought of how college football has changed beyond recognition deteriorated progressed to its current state of bizarre sponsorships. We now have the AT&T Cotton Bowl, the Allstate Sugar Bowl, the Konica Minolta Gator Bowl, the Tostitos Fiesta Bowl, the Brut Sun Bowl, and the FedEx Orange Bowl. The Peach Bowl has disappeared completely and in its place we have the Chick-fil-A Bowl. And just what exactly is an R+L Carrier and a Who is Roady? Don’t get me started.

When I was young (don’t you just hate it when old people start their sentences that way?) there were not many bowl games. Only the Rose Bowl, the Orange Bowl, the Sugar Bowl, and the Cotton Bowl were televised. Later the Gator Bowl joined them, and the Fiesta Bowl, and the Sun Bowl. Newcomers like the Liberty Bowl, the Citrus Bowl, and the Peach Bowl came along. Somewhere along the way, things got out of hand and American college football went completely berserk. Now there are 34 bowls vying for your time, attention, viewing loyalty, and alumni dollars.

Where will it stop? No one can say.

I stopped caring a long time ago. Who participates in or wins the Bowl or the Meineke Car Care Bowl or the Chick-fil-A Bowl or the Little Caesars Pizza Bowl or even, God help us, the San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl is of no consequence to me. None at all. They do not even register on my radar screen. But advertisers everywhere, take note: You need not care what I think. I am not part of the coveted demographic group of 18-to-49-year-olds, the designated target audience for your advertising budgets.

Speaking of Hubert Humphrey, he’s the one on the left in the photo below. Apparently having to spend a lot of time in the company of Lyndon Johnson could make even “The Happy Warrior” a bit glum.

Or perhaps there is another reason. Perhaps Hubert just learned that Slippery Rock lost to Fisk in the Mayo Clinic Blue Cross Blue Shield Bowl.

Rant ended. Seacrest out.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. I believe the person in uniform is General Creighton Abrams, sharing unpleasant details about Vietnam; enough to bring a worried frown to any face.

    Your list of bowl games is mind-boggling. Once upon a time, in the early days of televised sports, I seem to recall that I watched the Rose Bowl... or perhaps it was only the parade that I watched. :)

  3. Hi, Sis and Pat, two of this blog's most faithful readers!

    Pat is right; the third man in the photo is indeed General Creighton Abrams, who succeeded General William Westmoreland in Vietnam when LBJ gave Gen. Westmoreland the heave-ho.

    I think bowl games are called bowl games because the stadiums (correct Latin plural: stadia) are vaguely bowl-shaped. They stay this way all the time, not just on days when "bowl" games are played.

    And I still love the Rose Bowl Parade, which had its 121st outing yesterday in Pasadena, California.

    Oddity of the day: I happened to turn on the TV in mid-parade, just as the band from Walton High School in Marietta, Georgia, was passing by. We lived in (or near) Marietta for 28 years, and my children would have attended Walton if we had not moved to another house. What a cosinsaquance! The announcer kept saying, "Marietta is near 'Smeer-na'," and "Have you ever been to 'Smeer-na'?," and "Where is 'Smeer-na' exactly?" I wanted to kick the television screen in as the adjacent town, Smyrna, is pronounced as though "myrrh" was in the middle, and the local preference is to make it into three syllables, thusly: "Suh-myrhh-nuh." The same locals also say "May-retta," thereby restoring the balance of syllables in the universe and delighting the Northern transplants who love to think of themselves as superior to anything local.

    Oh, and thanks for commenting!

  4. I know! Can you belive all these bowls? Back in my day they didn't have sports on TV. If you wanted to watch sports you went out and played one! Actually they didn't even have TV. If we wanted to know the score of the jousting we waited by the dock for the boat to give us the score from Six months ago.

    Wow your old and irrelavent. No one cares what you think Ben Franklin.

  5. When I was young I didn't care for football and I still don't. To us Dutch, bowl is something you have at parties. All kinds of fruit in fruitjuice. Sometimes with alcohol. I think you call it punch.
    When I was young I liked bowl. And I still do.

  6. What a load of bowls!
    I am fuming with disgust that you have declared yourself an honorary Leeds United fan! Hull City are Yorkshire's top team and we have an American up front - Jozy Altidore. Grrrrr! I may never visit your blog again but I am so upset I can't think straight at the moment.

  7. Thanks For Commenting, continued:

    Anonymous, I don't mind being called "old" (which I am) or "irrelavent" (you could use a remedial course in spelling), but I simply cannot abide being compared to Ben Franklin unless your diatribe is accompanied by a $100 bill (the one with old, irrelevant Ben's picture on it)

    Yorkshire Pudding, please do not give up on my blog just yet. What I meant to say is that I am a fan of ALL Yorkshire teams, not placing one above another because I don't have a dog in this fight. Also, my friend Dave Hewitt, who used to play bass guitar in the British rock band Babe Ruth along with Alan Shacklock, is from Yorkshire.

  8. I am thinking straighter now that the turkey stew is bubbling. Although emotionally scarred, I forgive you. At many English football grounds - even when Leeds are not playing - you will hear the chant go up "We all hate Leeds scum! We all hate Leeds scum!" You're better off with Hull City and Roary the Tiger!

  9. the very biggest bowl tonight, no not thursday night 1 aginst 2, but tonight super sized tcu against my old home town boise state both unbeaten and unchAllenged, so thanks for your time spent on the here's a bowl schedule....i am probably one of the very few thqt will use this???/

  10. You have performed a great community service. How else would us football haters know how many really silly bowls there are.
    Now I can drop some of those bowl names on my unsuspecting football fanatics with questions like..
    Who won this year's San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl ? Who played in it?
    This is going to be fun.

  11. well tough luck everyone, it looks like boise state are NATIONAL CHAMPIONS, tough luck to georgia state florida bama, my old home town NATIONAL CHAMPS

  12. and dr. john biteyour tongue....hate is a pretty big word