Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Laughing all the way to the bank

Perhaps because this blog has several readers from the Southern Hemisphere (Ahoy, Katherine! Hi, Helsie! Hey there, Elisabeth!), my creative juices have been working overtime. I have created a whodunit television series to be set in Down Under. I’ve already fleshed out several characters, including:

Sydney Melbourne -- A shy, retiring, private detective in his thirties who is very effective at getting to the bottom of heinous crimes, especially those committed during the heat of passion, using only his brilliant mind and his uncanny knack for recognizing clues others have overlooked. He longs to have a romantic relationship with:

Adelaide Brisbane -- His beautiful, blonde, twenty-something assistant who joins him in crime-solving exploits. Alas, Adelaide is not the least interested in the seemingly (but only seemingly) tame Sydney, not realising that his still water runs particularly deep, preferring rather the likes of:

Darwin Perth -- An exceedingly handsome yet villainous ne’er-do-well who has designs of his own on Adelaide. He would like nothing better than to have her in his clutches, but he is thwarted time and time again by:

Hobart -- Adelaide’s pet kookaburra, who bursts into gales of laughter whenever the dastardly Darwin makes an amorous move toward Adelaide, such as asking whether she would like to see his billabong.

Alice Springs -- A demure librarian by day who doubles as an espionage agent. Each night, using only a knowledge of Morse Code and a short-wave radio, she reports to her superiors in the Government Communications Security Bureau (GCSB) of New Zealand from her secret, subterranean headquarters located beneath Ayers Rock. Alice is seriously considering birdnapping Hobart and training him in the ways of carrier pigeons.

These are just a few of the regular characters who will appear on-screen each week to interact with an ever-changing supply of murderers and victims.

Each week a recurring subplot will revolve around the attempts of both Alice and Hobart to keep Darwin away from Adelaide. Hobart wants Adelaide to marry Sydney, and Alice fancies Darwin for herself. I think the show has definite possibilities. I may truly be on to something (not to be confused with on something).

I am currently working on an idea for a show about a young kangaroo who wants to have lots of friends. I’m thinking of calling it Pal Joey.

If you have any ideas for scripts, you may submit them in the comments section.


  1. I think you could liven up the soap opera with addition of a mature organ playing character from the southern states of America - perhaps escaping angry mobs of Obama supporters. You could call him Smiggin Holes after another Australian place. Mind you if you decide to add me to the character list I'd like to be known as Yorkeys Knob - another oddly named place in Oz. I'd play the part of a womanising sports star who had just won millions of dollars on the Australian lottery.

  2. hope one day i can have chances to travel this places.:)

  3. Very good, rhymsie! Reminds me of that audience soap opera thing that used to be on the Tonight Show, many years ago when Johnny Carson was host. It was hilarious!

  4. Ha. Very fun! I'd like to be known as Katherine, after the town, River and Gorge in Australia.

    I'd play the older artist who lives underground in a very charming and well-appointed Coober Pedy Hobbit Hole. The excavation of the aforementioned underground dwelling reveled a rich opal seam, resulting in the unique ability of this artist, of all those in the whole world, to be self-supporting due to the incorporation of opal fragments in my paintings not unlike the pre-renaissance use of lapis lazuli.

    I don't mind a bit-part as I'm quite busy at the moment.

  5. I'd play St Helen's, the angelic and all forgiving local school teacher - the type that everyone remembers as having enormous influence and who brought out the best in them when everyone else abandoned them as n'er-do-wells.

  6. PS. Be very careful about lumping the Kiwis in with the Aussies.
    The Aussies have a good sense of self-esteem and don't usually care, but Kiwis are definitely not Australian. That's like calling a Canadian 'American'. Or worse.

  7. Katherine, au contraire! Far from "lumping the Kiwis in with the Aussies," this post says that New Zealand has spies in Australia who report regularly on what is transpiring.

    Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty.

  8. Oh. Sorry. I didn't see that bit.