Saturday, February 3, 2018

From Natchez to Mobile, from Memphis to Saint Joe, wherever the four winds blow

Groundhog Day came and went on February 2nd, but I ignored all the folderol festivities surrounding this year’s event. Instead, I went about my business as though, in the overall scheme of things, it made absolutely no difference whether various and sundry large rodents do or do not indicate that we would have six more weeks of winter.

Because it didn’t (make any difference).

Moving right along....

In the previous post I mentioned that Orange Beach, Alabama, is located west of Pensacola, Florida, and east of Mobile Bay, on the other side of which is the city of Mobile, Alabama. In a comment, our friend Snowbrush who lives nowadays in Eugene, Oregon, but was originally from Mississippi, said that his half-sister’s house is in Pensacola and he drove through Mobile many a time to get to her house in Pensacola but had never heard of Orange Beach.

This challenge to my veracity cannot go unanswered. The proof, as they say, is in the pudding, and for our purposes the pudding happens to be the following map of the area:


There it is, ladies and gentlemen, stretching from Pascagoula, Mississippi, on the left to just past Pensacola, Florida, on the right. You see Mobile. You see Pensacola. And if you look very closely and squint and hold your tongue just right, you will also see Orange Beach down along the coast. I rest my case. I never said you went through Orange Beach on the way from Mobile to Pensacola, either on I-10 today or on U.S. 90 back in the days before I-10 was built, when Snowbrush was visiting his half-sister.

I do find it rather bizarre, however, that a notice that Alabama Law Requires All Motorcycle Operators and Riders Wear A Helmet appears in the middle of the Gulf Of Mexico.

9 comments:

  1. Perhaps it is hazardous to ride in the Gulf with no helmet.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Emma, no perhaps about it. In deep water, a diving helmet is the recommended piece of equipment.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I thoroughly concur with your declaration that the proof is in The Pudding! However, in England we say, "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" and I am not about to become a tasty snack just to prove that Agent Orange Beach really exists. Is Agent Orange Beach between Red Beach and Yellow Beach?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Yorkshire Pudding I defer to an actual Englishman. You are absolutely correct, the old saying is “The proof of the pudding is in the eating”, not my mangled, mixed-up version, “The proof is in the pudding.” How Colonial of me. You can always tell a Colonial, you know, but you can’t tell him much. This time you did. You are also absolutely correct in your second point. Not only are there a Red Beach, an Orange Beach, and a Yellow Beach, there are also a Green Beach, a Blue Beach, an Indigo Beach, and a Violet Beach. Not in Florida or Alabama, you understand, but undoubtedly somewhere on this planet. When my mother was young and lived in Philadelphia, she did not know a Violet Beach but she did know a Violet Roach. She told me so herself. How far afield your comment has taken me. I must get back to the present. I simply must. Beam me up, Scotty.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Are you losing your mind?! I never meant to imply that you were dishonest. I just meant to say that Orange Beach (being ON the BEACH) is off the main road and would have only appeared to me as an instantly forgotten exit sign.

    How about entitling your next post "Natchez to New Orleans, Living on the Natchez Queen"? I'll bet you even know what that's from.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Snowbrush, I am definitely not, repeat, NOT losing my mind, but your comment reminded me of a sign I saw recently, “Of all the things I’ve lost I miss my mind the most.” I never thought you were implying that I was dishonest, it was just my testosterone talking. Also, back in those days Orange Beach was much smaller; maybe the exit sign said Foley or Gulf Shores.

      Delete
  6. P.S. "In deep water, a diving helmet is the recommended piece of equipment."

    I personally (but I'm just talking about me) wear one anytime the depth of the water exceeds the height of my nose.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Snowbrush, regarding anytime the depth of the water exceeds the height of your nose, #me_too

      Delete
  7. "it was just my testosterone talking."

    I sold mine on on Craigslist and am glad to be rid of it and all the problems it caused. Seriously, did you know that really high levels of testosterone makes a man violent and reckless (not to forget obnoxious), but that levels that are a little elevated makes him a better heavy equipment operator (because of his ability to finesse the controls), and that it has the same effect on women? Despite the philandering that I wrote about recently, I never thought that I had excess testosterone, but I am certainly glad to have less than what I did since I don't plan to start operating bulldozers.

    ReplyDelete