I thought the pain was easing and the discolorations were fading slightly, but no. It was just wishful thinking.
It’s becoming a regular pharmacy around here.
I currently take three pills in the morning prescribed by my cardiologist (Cozaar, Toprol, and 1/4-grain Aspirin), one from my family doctor (the Valtrex), and two extra-strength Tylenol. In mid-afternoon I take two more of the Tylenols and another Valtrex. Before bedtime I take three other cardiologist-prescribed pills (a Zocor and two extended-release Niacin), two more extra-strength Tylenol, and a third Valtrex. I keep Nitrostat (nitroglycerin pills) on hand “just in case” of a heart flare-up but I am happy to report that in the 17 years since my heart attack I have never had to take a single one. Oh, and I just completed a three-month tour on Omeprazole (the generic equivalent of The Purple Pill) courtesy of the gastroenterologist following my first-ever endoscopy (bleeding ulcer) and colonoscopy (polyp). Counting the Omeprazole, that’s 16 pills a day, about 14 more than I would like to be ingesting.
I’m turning into a regular Snowbrush.
Well, maybe things haven’t quite reached that point yet.
But that which I greatly fear
I speak of the condition we all dread. A-G-E.
Age.
Old age.
Nah.
It’s probably just the shingles talking.
In honor of the occasion, though, I have composed a pome (translation: some doggerel verse):
Old age -- it ain’t for sissies;
Old age -- it ain’t for wimps.
Old age is full of gases
Like those they put in blimps.
Old age has come a-knocking;
Old age will get us all.
Old age makes people long for
Dear dead days beyond recall.
Old age -- the final frontier --
Into it we boldly go
Where none of us has gone before.
What’s there? You don’t want to know.
(End of pome)
If you’re the type who likes to get a second opinion, you can always go with Robert Browning up there in the title of this post.
Otherwise, take two aspirin and call me in the morning.
