Except that it wasn’t. That is a poor analogy.
Now it can be told. Not that it couldn’t have been told before, but I simply chose not to share the information.
For nearly two weeks I have been doing battle with a very large kidney stone, or perhaps I should say a very large stone in one of my kidneys. (It’s the stone that was large, not the kidney. I mean, I may have a large kidney, I don’t know, but that is not pertinent to the story.)
Depending on various expert estimates, the stone was 5-6mm, or 8mm, or 10mm. It weren’t goin’ noplace on its own, ducky.
As of this evening, finally, all the pain is gone, due to the fact that I went into the hospital today and the kidney stone is now gone.
Kaput.
Blasted to smithereens.
I did not undergo the perhaps more-familiar Extra-corporeal Shock Wave Lithotripsy (ESWL) , a procedure in which a kidney stone is blasted from without with sound (a sonic wave) in an attempt to break it into smaller, you should excuse the expression, chunks, which can pass more easily through the ureter into the bladder.
I underwent the perhaps less-familiar ureteroscopy.
My ureteroscopy today was not from without. It was most definitely from within. It involved inserting a tube with a laser and a camera into Mr. Peepee in an attempt to touch the stone (with the laser, silly, not with the camera) and dissolve it (the stone, silly, not the laser).
The procedure, I am happy to report, worked. I would have had to wait five more days to get the sonic-blast ESWL because I take low-dose aspirin daily for my heart condition, and a person has be off blood-thinners for a period before ESWL is tried. Then, if that procedure failed (and it does, 15% of the time) , I would still have had to undergo the laser ureteroscopy anyway, which is almost always successful. So I opted for the Less Is More (also known as the Why Prolong The Agony? approach.
I feel normal again.
Not that any of you ever really knew what “normal” might look like in my case. You’ll just have to take my word for it.
There are eight million kidney stone stories in The Naked City.
This has been just one of them.
Hello, world! This blog began on September 28, 2007, and so far nobody has come looking for me
with tar and feathers.
On my honor, I will do my best not to bore you. All comments are welcome
as long as your discourse is civil and your language is not blue.
Happy reading, and come back often!
And whether my cup is half full or half empty, fill my cup, Lord.
Copyright 2007 - 2024 by Robert H.Brague
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
<b>Post-election thoughts</b>
Here are some mangled aphorisms I have stumbled upon over the years: 1. If you can keep your head when all anout you are losing thei...
I'm happy to hear that all is now ell.
ReplyDeleteOuch. And wince. And cringe. I am very, very glad to hear the pain has gone. Permanently I trust.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry you had to go through that! But I'm glad you're back to your usual (notice how I didn't say "normal" there?) self. Blessings!
ReplyDeleteGlad they were able to get it. Trying to "pass" one is a whole other story and ESWL is no picnic either.
ReplyDeleteRest and recreate RWP!
I don't get it. Who is this Mr. Peepee? Is he a neighbour? What does he look like? Sounds like an ice cream vendor to me. It would have been helpful if you had posted some photos of the operation but I am pleased that you are now back to normal. Urination is a joyous activity when it is pain free.
ReplyDeleteI've spent the last 11 days in the hospital. Not as a patient, mind you, but as a support person for my ma who has chemo-related pneumonia (and cancer). It always amazes me to come home and realize that life has gone on without me; the sun still rises in the morning, bills still come in the mail and there is actual food still on the planet! One fun trip to the hospital cafeteria was the day they posted the soup of the day: BEEF BARELY. Yep. Truth.
ReplyDeleteGlad you're feeling better!!
p.s. I bet Mr. York Pud spent a fair amount of his time in the principal's office in his youth....
ReplyDeleteGood to hear that. I can empathise, as I have a huge kidney stone that is presently causing me no bother. They won't do any kind of op on me anymore unless it's absolutely necessary, and as long as it doesn't hurt, I'm happy. I have however passed two previous ones. I actually caught one and took it to the doctor who was incredulous at the size of it. She said the sin must have been akin to giving birth. I'm not arguing either, but I wouldn't go to the hospital at the time as I was so afraid of going back in after...well after a few mistakes were made. Though the whole camera down the dong thing is very unpleasant I'm highly relieved you're done with the damn thing. Sore kidneys and kidney stones are hell on a stick (restrains herself from rhyming a word beginning with D in that sentence, not being a coarse miss).
ReplyDelete