Saturday, December 17, 2016

The third time is supposed to be the charm

So here goes, with my deepest apologies to composer Mel Torme:

A Chrimma Thong
by Mail Tore May

Jest knots roosting buy a no pan far,
Chuck froze Nippon nature knows,
You'll tight cure-alls bean sum buy acquire,
End foe stress top lack ask emotes --

Ovary buddy no zit turnkey end sum missal tow
Alp tomato* session bride;
Tinny tuts wither rise awe log low
Wool finite heart two slip tune height.

Juneau dads ant a sauna sway
His looted loss sub toes zing hoodies onus lay,
An debris mudder's childish gown twos pie
Two sea a friend dear rally no had deaf lye.

An sew eye muff ring dish ample frays
Took kiss firm wonder nightie too;
Awl doe wits bin shed mini dimes, mini weighs,
"Myrrh reek Chrimma stew ewe!"

*you have to pronounce it the American way, to-MAY-toh, because to-MAH-toh just doesn't work.

In closing, and with my deepest thanks to all of you for indulging my maddening seemingly unending occasional forays into this strange passion of mine to explore what it is possible to do with the English language, here's Nat King Cole's iconic version of the genuine article (3:15).


  1. We've discussed the Anguish Languish before! Many moons ago though, I mentioned Stanly Unwin and I did a post on the whole thing. It's somewhere in the past vaults, sadly my search options are rather rubbish mostly due to the fact that I rarely ever use titles for posts that make it clear what the post is about. This is done on purpose to keep my blog off the radar for normal folks who might end up linking through, but in retrospect is a pain in the bum for referencing anything once written tsk! It's all great stuff and I love your enjoyment of wordplay asnit matches mine *nods smiling *

  2. Rye Muswit Play-Guh, udder why's gnome as Bubbray-Guh, hasgun crumply-tea mad. Creep tay king da medsun Bub!

  3. All Consuming, have you thought of including labels?

    Yorkshire Pudding, very nice! I'm crumply-tea impressed as well.