If there was ever any doubt, I know I am old because that song has to be 70 years old if it's a day. I remember hearing Ethel Merman and Russell Nype sing it on Ed Sullivan's Toast Of The Town program on a Sunday night on our old black-and-white, 12-inch screen, Philco television set when I was nine or 10 years old, and I was born in 1941. And there it was this morning, singing itself in my brain, complete with images of Ethel and Russell.
All the foregoing show-biz facts were
I hear singing and there's no one there
I smell blossoms and the trees are bare
All day long I seem to walk on air
I wonder why, I wonder why
I keep tossing in my sleep at night
And what's more I've lost my appetite
Stars that used to twinkle in the skies
Are twinkling in my eyes, I wonder why
You don't need analyzing,
It is not so surprising
That you feel very strange but nice
Your heart goes pitter-patter
I know just what's the matter
Because I've been there once or twice
Put your head on my shoulder
You need someone who's older
A rub-down with a velvet glove
There is nothing you can take
To relieve that pleasant ache
You're not sick, you're just in love
Back in the day, Russell Nype sang the first section and Ethel Merman sang the second section, and then they joined forces and sang their separate tunes together at the same time. And trust me, even though Russell's part had eight lines and Ethel's part had 12 lines, it all meshed together nicely and they both finished at the same time. In music I believe doing this is called counterpoint.
I would include an audio clip or perhaps even a video clip, but I think you should do some things for yourself.
I may be an idiot savant (though that term has fallen out of use) or I may just be an idiot.
And (as if you needed further proof) there is this, of course:
Here are some recent answers on Jeopardy! that I knew but which none of the real contestants could answer:
What are cargo cults?
What is Kilauea?
Who is Philip II?
What is fudge?
What is cathode?
What is Mount Rainier?
What is the Louvre?
Who is Jesse James?
Your Honor (British, Honour), I rest my case.